Happy Halloween!!!

5 More Days...

...until this sack of election drama is tied off and Bush spends the next 3 months destroying us all.

I did not drink the kool-aid...

I am very, very tired of being told that I have been brain-washed, or that I drank the kool-aid, or that I think Obama is a savior or that I can't decide for myself sinceI support Senator Obama for President because I think he is the best man for the job today.

First of all, the opposite of the kool-aid rumor is true. Every person who mindlessly forwards these anti-Obama, panicky, who is Barack Obama really??? emails is not thinking for themselves. All you have to do is the littlest bit of research and you can find out everything you want to know about the man.

But some people are too lazy to do research. Some people would rather forward sensational and ridiculous emails than read the facts and make a mature decision based on those facts and not on their personal fears.

Some people would rather stand silently by while election after election after election is stolen from the voters. They would rather be manipulated with and by fear than look the beast in the eye once and for all.

Some people have been drinking an awful lot of the Rove kool-aid for many, many years. And boy oh boy, that Sarah Palin just keeps ladling it out to you in non-biodegradable styrofoam cups and you just swallow, swallow, swallow as you press the forward button on your email again and and again. Forwarding sugary nonsense and plotless ghost stories like:

Is Barack Obama really a man? I've never seen his penis. Hmm... if he's really a man with nothing to hide, why doesn't he drop trow in front of the whole country on Fox news???

OR:

Did you know Barack Obama is married to a black woman??? And she has a funny name the starts with "Mi" and ends in "chelle"? Like that Beatles song??? Was she Paul's lover??? I want to see her marriage license to Barack Obama right now!!! I don't believe that they are really married because Paul McCartney wrote a song about her when she was just a little girl, so clearly she must have been married to Paul McCartney first.

And did you know that Michelle Obama graduated from college??? Two times???? Her thesis is on the google and I have a friend of a friend of an imaginary friend who saw it on the google and it said "white people are sometimes racist" and is that the kind of first lady we want representing our country at fashion shows around the world???? A wife and mother who went to college??? Can you imagine??? What for??? Where is her diploma??? What kind of uppity elite does she think she is with her college and her children and her husband and her house??? Obviously, she hates America or she would have nothing at all and like it!!! Unpatriotic elite college-educated mother!!! Let's see her birth certificate!!! I'll just be she's a robot!!!

I just don't trust that Barack Obama. I don't know what it is... I just don't trust him. I just don't trust him, I don't know what it is... Who does he think he is with his funny name??? How dare he go to college??? His mother got divorced twice!!! If he were for real and not an elite he would have wallowed in misery. How dare the child of a single mother take advantage of the educational opportunities in this country and run for President??? Who does he think he is??? He sure is uppity!!! He just doesn't know his place! Only the rich and inbred are allowed to run for president in my America! You can't trust anybody who doesn't understand that simple fact. Clearly he's a terrorist!!!

And yesterday in Tennessee, the FBI broke up a ring of skinheads who were planning on assassinating Senator Barack Obama and beheading dozens and dozens of African-American high school students. (I will not post photos of ose deluded, attention-seeking sociopaths. Here is a "rendition" of them to the left.)

Somehow, those violent skinheads just didn't trust the good American people and their lying, stupid emails to keep Obama out of the Oval Office, so they stockpiled their firearms and decided to take out the next generation of possibly uppity dark-skinned elites for good measure.

And somewhere in Dubai, Karl Rove types another email while veiled belly dancers serve him tea...

Evidently, I'll Eat Pretty Much Anything

This is a food meme. I got it from Nigel.

• Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
• Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
• Put in red any items that you would never consider eating.
  

The VGT Omnivore’s Hundred:

1. Venison

2. Nettle tea

3. Huevos rancheros

4. Steak tartare One of my favorites! Mmmmm, raw, red meat.

5. Crocodile

6. Black pudding

7. Cheese fondue

8. Carp

9. Borscht

10. Baba ghanoush

11. Calamari

12. Pho

13. PB&J sandwich

14. Aloo gobi

15. Hot dog from a street cart

16. Epoisses

17. Black truffle

18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes

19. Steamed pork buns

20. Pistachio ice cream

21. Heirloom tomatoes

22. Fresh wild berries

23. Foie gras

24. Rice and beans

25. Brawn, or head cheese

26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper -- but I cried all over myself! As an ex once said, "Pain is a flavor."

27. Dulce de leche

28. Oysters -- another favorite!

29. Baklava -- I've worked at a couple of Greek Restaraunts -- but I only ate the baklava at one of them. I generally don't like flies in my pastries.

30. Bagna cauda

31. Wasabi peas --I've seen them at Trader Joe's. As much as I like wasabi, these things do not appeal to me.

32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl

33. Salted lassi -- I like the fruit lassis better.

34. Sauerkraut

35. Root beer float --My son would rather have RBFs than cake on his b-day.

36. Cognac with a fat cigar

37. Clotted cream tea

38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O

39. Gumbo

40. Oxtail

41. Curried goat -- There used to be a great Nigerian take-out near one of my jobs that served curried goat with yams. mmmmm.... And yes, pain is a flavor.

42. Whole insects --Chocolate-covered ants AND fried grasshopper.

43. Phaal

44. Goat’s milk

45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more -- thanks Pete, Richard and Sam!!!

46. Fugu -- I don't ever need to eat anything that poisonous.
47. Chicken tikka masala

48. Eel

49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut

51. Prickly pear -- the jelly

52. Umeboshi

53. Abalone -- but I can't wait to try it!

54. Paneer

55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal

56. Spaetzle -- I had to google it first, and yes, I have eaten it.

57. Dirty gin martini

58. Beer above 8% ABV -- Thank god for the Belgians.

59. Poutine

60. Carob chips
61. S’mores

62. Sweetbreads

63. Kaolin -- seriously, what is this? According to google, it's Chinese clay or an emollient used with anhydrous as an insecticide???

64. Currywurst

65. Durian

66. Frogs’ legs -- When I bartended in the country, one of my regulars went frog giggin', deepfried his harvest and brought them into the bar. Meh..

67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake

68. Haggis

69. Fried plantain -- I love fried plantain...

70. Chitterlings, or andouillette

71. Gazpacho -- Not only have I eaten gazpacho, 3 other women and I did a performance piece in college which involved the creation of a batch of gazpacho as a metaphor for how much La Reconquista shaped Spanish culture.

72. Caviar and blini

73. Louche absinthe

74. Gjetost, or brunost

75. Roadkill --I'd like to say never, but the economy is tight and I'd sure as heck carry a dead possum home for soup before I'd let the family starve.

76. Baijiu

77. Hostess Fruit Pie

78. Snail

79. Lapsang souchong

80. Bellini

81. Tom yum -- very good, but I prefer Tom Kha

82. Eggs Benedict

83. Pocky

84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.

85. Kobe beef

86. Hare

87. Goulash

88. Flowers

89. Horse -- see #75

90. Criollo chocolate

91. Spam

92. Soft shell crab

93. Rose harissa

94. Catfish

95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox

97. Lobster Thermidor

98. Polenta

99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee

100. Snake

Rep. Michelle Bachmann is NOT "Minnesota Nice"!

Meet Rep. Michelle Bachmann of Minnesota. She and her BFF are pictured here joyfully stuffing their faces with ice cream. Why are they so joyful? Maybe they're watching video of water board sessions at Guantanamo Bay???

You may remember Ms. Bachmann's Minnesota Nice speech from the GOP convention, delivered while the nice St. Paul police force was arresting journalists from left wing news sources.

Today, Michelle Bachmann told Chris Matthews on Hardball that she wants every "anti-american" member of Congress -- especially Barack and Michelle Obama -- investigated for their "anti-american activities".

Like what?

Is she concerned about treasonous acts like outing an undercover CIA agent in a war zone for purposes of petty personal revenge? Is she referring to suspending habeas corpus? Or maybe the anti-american activities she's talking about involve torturing prisoners of war at Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo Bay?

Rep. Bachmann, there is no room for McCarthyism in this day and age. Pack up your bags,lady. There is an election in November and I sure do hope the very nice people of Minnesota's 6th District are about to hand a Representative's seat to your opponent, Elwyn Tinklenberg. He reports that donations have suddenly started pouring into his campaign office.

I love all of you...

What's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding?

--Elvis Costello

McCain moons the U.S.

Evidently, we voters are all just Joe 6pack the Plumber Butt. Hey, and those folks at Palin's rallies who are calling Obama a terrorist and shouting "kill him" are good patriots, according to Senator McCain. But what really matters is McCain's widdle feewings got hurt when an "American hero" compared him to George Wallace. Does anyone still remember that old saw about sticks and stones?

You know what, I can't even be rational anymore. I'm not giving you links to all of the facts behind this one. Suffice it to say, if you ever forwarded an email about Obama which questioned his last name and rumored "terrorist ties", shame on you! If you ever forwarded an email or repeated the lie that he is a Muslim -- shame on you! (Not that it should matter, but it does to many.)

The fact is, if anyone harms a hair on this man's head because of his skin tone or his name we are all culpable. Every gleeful forwarder of bullshit, fear-mongering emails has an itchy trigger finger. Our national racism has moved long past the "different cultures" phase and is hysterically careening into provoking violence and assasination. Shame on you negligent fact-checkers. Shame on you Rovian toadies. Shame on you emailers of lies. Shame on all of the archetypical Joes. Shame on Sarah Palin. Shame on John McCain. Shame on your goony supporters.

Shame on all of U.S.!!!

Tuning in...

I need to tune into another psychic station for a few days, because the state of the world is so not good right now -- honestly, my state of mind isn't so good either. I haven't been feeling well. I am in the wrong line of work. And yet somehow, I feel like I'm on the cusp of figuring something important out -- if only I could break through that final layer of skin, rip off the scabs or something.

Also -- mermaids have very dramatic, passionate love lives but not such stable ones. This is mostly a result of personal choices with the occasional lifestyle consequence thrown in... some of us are not really cut out for domesticity. And don't ever let anyone shame you into being something you are not or wearing costumes that don't fit.

Pirates are sexy and roguish and best of all, impermanent. I am not stupid. I knew that ship would set sail eventually. In fact, I counted on it -- torn between the tight excited flush of eploration and the desire to return to the ocean floor to mull it all over.

Unraveleing a tangle of thoughts, sensations and emotions is a joy unto itself.

Dear Congress,

Thank you for passing the Bailout Bill with 58 more yeas than Monday. It's been a productive week for you and it always comforts me so much to see Congress lay down like Bush's bitches again and again. Tell me, did it hurt when you had your spines surgically removed in order to keep your Congressional seats? Do you expect to still have jobs on November 4th?

Yes, my friends, Congress passed the Bailout Bill, which means we, the people are up shit creek without a paddle. We will be footing this bill. We will have to keep working until we are very, very old....

...but the good news is that all of the filthy, rich people on Wall Street won't be losing any money. In fact, Congress voted today to fix all of their problems by giving them more money than we've spent on the war and occupation of Iraq since March 2003. Yes, my friends, the Bush family's oil addiction and grudge against Saddam Hussein is officially cheaper than the unregulated, greedy hubris of Wall Street and the Banking industry.

But, let's show some compassion... those CEOs have problems, too. For example, some lost their jobs. Alan Fisher was released from WaMu (woo-hoo!) just 18 days after collecting an $18.5 million sign-on bonus. Alan Fuld is probably unhirable after driving Lehman Brothers into the sub-basement, and all he got after 30 years of service was $500 million dollars.

That's why Henry Paulson (Bush's appointed Treasury Secretary) had to make sure his former employer (Goldman Sachs) was one of the biggest beneficiaries of this Bailout Bill. That's why Congress had to pass this bill -- because we all know that if Bush doesn't get his way, elections get stolen, the terrorists win, things blow up and people die. Seriously.

So can you blame Congress for giving all of our money to fix Wall Street when the market no longer fixed itself? Well, yes... you can and I do. But the truth is that the Executive Office Cabal has everyone so bullied, terrified and tortured that we can't even pass a motion to impeach them. So in this country you might get impeached for having oral sex, but not for treason.

Everybody, be cool! This is a robbery! It's another heist engineered by the wickedest men this planet has ever seen. Are we surpirsed that Congress has once again chickened out and handed our wallets over to the man with the gun pointed to our collective temple? We shouldn't be. "Your money or your life!" Given that choice, please, take my money. As Jesus said, Give to Ceaser what is Ceaser's... hmmmm... I wonder WWJD today....

This post is dedicated to my brilliant sister Meander. She knows why.

Do you really want to let the jokers in Washington burn your money bailing out Wall Street ?

You can stop the bailout. Call your representative in Congress A.S.A.P!!!

Tell them to vote no on Bush's Bailout Scheme. We have to advocate for ourselves. Step up your game and contact your Representative now.

Go here to find your representative and their digits.

Do you need some money?

Well, then get to work! Democracy is a participatory process so you'd better start participating while we still (kinda) have a Democracy. Let's call our Senators and stop this bailout.
*****

You know you are cheap and you don't want to give $430 of your blood, sweat and tears to save the bankers and the Wall Street CEOs. I'm sure you could really use that $430 to heat your house this December or to fill up your gas tank or to buy groceries this month, because maybe you already lost your job.

*****

And don't believe that scary story about how we're all going to starve to death and suffer another Great Depression if we don't give $700 billion dollars to the bankers, CEOs and stockbrokers RIGHT NOW. Repeat this next part out loud, right now: No one is going to die if the bankers and stock brokers and CEOs do not get $700 billion dollars. At worst, the CEOs won't get their Holiday bonus.

*****

When was the last time you got a Holiday Bonus? I know when I got MY last Holiday Bonus. It was December of 2000.

*****

And who came up with this whole bailout scheme in the first place? Oh, yeah! The same guy who moved into the Oval Office two months after I got my last Holiday Bonus. Coincidence?

*****

Why can't Bush just get Halliburton to pay some taxes on all of their brazillion death dollars in government contracts in Iraq? Plus, they should pay back the millions in taxpayer dollars they "lost". I know it's only about 10% of what Bush says his filthy rich cronies need, but I bet we can come up with 10 more similar plans.

*****

For example, eliminating the $64 million going to every CEO of every bankrupt company -- I bet that comes to another 5 or 10%. Bush could throw in 10%, and so can every Senator who votes in favor of the bailout.

*****

And I've read a couple of things that are beginning to convince me that this bailout -- which will cost us more money than the Occupation of Iraq -- is not really going to save the economy. It could hurt the economy, as any $700 billion dollar expenditure will. (Here is a very informative article by Dean Baker and here is another one and here is one from the Washington Post and here is a whole list of them from a google search.)

*****

So if you haven't called your Senators to oppose this bullshit bailout, you'd better get on it -- they are voting on the bill at 9 pm ET tonight (10/01). Click on this to find both of your Senators' phone numbers. Then call and say, "I am a Constituent of Senator Blasé Blah and I vote and I volunteer time to campaigns I believe in. Tell Senator Blasé Blah to vote NO on the Bail Out Bill."

*****

If the Bill passes the Senate (which it will if you don't stop reading this and call both of your Senators RIGHT NOW) then call your Representative in Congress. Most likely, this version of the Bailout plan will be back for a vote in the House on Friday. You can see how your Representative voted on Monday here. (Make sure you note the total crap title of the Bill, as well.) Then you can encourage them to keep up the good work this Friday, or tell them to either change their position on Friday or pick up the want ads next month.

And go hear what Rep. Marcy Kaptur had to say about the bailout on JoeC's blog.